To first begin this journaling expedition with a forewarning to you, the audience, of this “blog.” This journal will in no way help lead you into my daily soap opera of a life like many others I’ve read and observed in the past. It will offer you windows, maybe sometimes mirrors, but surely never an open door into everything I do or openly feel. I am someone who –with great honor– sounds his heart safely to his sleeve, but in order to truly touch it you will have to puzzle your way through various jackets to reach it. Nothing I will write, pour, empty into words will logically make the obvious of sense – and why should it? Nothing is free. Should I continue to make your life any easier to digest by comforting you with my own? I take the greatest of prides in the days I am given and it would seem utterly egotistical to blatantly regurgitate to you the direct moments of my own life when you already have the conscious events of your own. Turn on the television or open a magazine if you’d like to live your life inside of another person. I’m not here writing to you, to spot light my face, or openly invite you into my world. I am here to help to aid in a revolution based on freedom and thought. I am here to create new things within myself, and possibly inside of you. This is made to hopefully make a difference somehow, somewhere.
I’ve found that going from point A to point B in life is becoming the route most taken as we adapt. And why shouldn’t it? It’s obviously and factually the quickest and most efficient of routes, and also the safest, and well, most comfortable form of travel. However, I feel because of that the world has become one big rubber padded existence, and is in many ways become too easily proofed by sciences and calculation. We are understanding patterns that were not intended for us… Well I apologize because this journal is truly not intended for you then if you enjoy the peacefulness of logic and fact. If you take kindly to reality, than perhaps you and I will not get along. Because what you see as meaningful, I see as shallow. What you may see as worthwhile, I will probably notice as utterly boring and redundant. This site, these thoughts, my drawings and music, all of it, is not intended to blissfully numb you into dumb founded tranquility…it is here to shove you, to stare at you. To make you think, to make you feel, to make you question. It is not working with you, it is working against you, to hopefully – in the grand scheme of things – help us all work a little better with each other in the end...
My personal work is always intended firstly for me, my release. It is my mark into a world of things and people that I am hopeful and eager to explore and connect with. My eyes are wide and I am ready to consume. To take in moments and air around me and to do what it is that I love to do most with it – exhale. To breathe in, and to exhale languages of visuals and sound. I make art to signify my waves in a pool of oceans and life. I make art to return what’s given to me. I make art to simply be alive.
I will in no way help you into my work, and for that I am sorry... However, I do extend the invitation still, into understanding my human complexities. Only you will have to clear the gap I’ve created between myself and you, on your own. There are no bridges into what I do, who I am, it’s just not as simple as that and in no way should be. We are all beautifully complex individuals that should in no way be taken for granted or easily labeled or identified. I will not offer you a point A and point B – an open path into my eyes. You will have to figure a route much farther out of the way if you so do choose to understand this. We as human beings, this world, our lives, cannot only be about two locations, a beginning and an end. There is so much middle between the two that must be explored in order to find the substance of truth and wisdom. We must always be entranced by our instincts and emotions by the life we live around us.
We are slipping on the holds of ourselves and one person, is becoming many. To understand what I do, who I am, will not be as easy as searching your neighbor or the market avenue for reference. You will first have to question what it is you do, who exactly you are. I’m not going to think for you, I have enough thoughts for myself, thank you very much. It is time for you to think on you own, as only whoever it is you are – and yes, don’t worry, you still have a brain. The computer or your Xbox hasn’t gotten to all of it yet, it’s still safe to come out into the light and think for yourself.
If you are searching for a recital of my day, or perhaps art work that will aesthetically capture what it is you are already able to see outside with your own eyes, you have come to the wrong place, my friend. I will offer you little reason, little method, and hopefully an irretraceable pattern to follow. My work will hopefully make you struggle, but in the end, hopefully you will find that I am very much just like you, a human being, with a heavy heart, and an eager mind.
I hope that this journal will be an interesting travel for both of us. My head has become quite stuffy with ideas and its time to let them breathe. Hopefully this vent will keep a steady flow of wind between your senses and my wings, leaving an exciting course of travel between you and I. While my art and writings are only my own…I am more than happy to share.
My feelings and languages are free to you now, good luck interpreting.
Always,
Adam
